Tag Archives: Real Housewives of OC

Real Housewives of Anywhere in This Country? Yes, Puhh-lease.

Do you know what I think is so funny and categorized under: inside jokes that I create and enjoy all by myself? I found Bravo host Andy Cohen on Twitter and I want to type him questions and comments about the show all day long. I actually make fun of myself as I’m doing it, but I want to do it so bad, that I won’t not do it. You know what I mean?

@BravoAndy Jill Zarin calling man’s shoe cheap while cleaning dog feces off of it in her kitchen sink. Did I really just see that?

Alright, let’s do this damn thing. And please, if you have a blog or post where you like to talk about The Real Housewives of anywhere in this country, link up. As always, comment at will.

I think that one of my favorite quotes from all of Real Housewives is when Bethenny from NY said in a reunion episode, “That’s normal reality show banter.” It made me love her, because it’s so true. Everybody needs to unload sometimes, but these ladies have a camera–that not only absorbs it, but records it forevermore. Forevermore. And some people get into the show and just hate on these women. Let me be clear, I do not hate. In fact, even when I dislike a personality that I watch each week, I still appreciate the casts’ willingness to put their lives on TV to be watched, admired, and/or judged.

One of the reasons that The Real Housewives simply fascinates me is that the cast members with the most difficult personalities come to the show seemingly thinking they’ll be loved. The producers of a show like this–especially a show like this on Bravo TV–know exactly what they’re doing when they choose who to show the audience. Watching a character like Danielle from NJ think that she has a point the world can relate to is nothing less than captivating. And when I see Danielle drive toward Caroline’s fundraiser to crash it, I think of Jeff Probst who often describes what happens in Survivor production when something crazy goes down on their show: They’re popping champagne bottles. Reality TV JACKPOT! I love watching that, even though I don’t agree with Danielle. At all.

Now, I’m watching NYC and NJ simultaneously off the DVR and I’ve got to tell you, it’s all so delicious. Sometimes it tastes a little sour, even bitter, but most of the time it’s just sugar and empty calories–quite the indulgence. NYC is pure drama. P.U.R.E. Drama. I’m thinking most of those ladies are pretty sad, most of the time, but I love to see them have a good day. And NJ is off-the-charts fantastic. NJ has to be, by far, my favorite cast of all the Real Housewives on Bravo TV. When they’re not making me laugh, they’re making me smile and I think many of them know true joy.

I am also loving that all of the cast members have blogs on BravoTV.com where they discuss each other and themselves after each episode. To try to get a conversation started, here is a list of my Favorite Housewives:

NeNe of ATL: NeNe is funny. I can’t be the only person who notices that she’s only mean to others when something in her life is making her really sad. I love her.

Candi of ATL: I love that she’s in the mix, because she’s so clear-headed and rational. The fact that she’s so sensical makes the nonsense on the show even more nonsensical. I love that. I wish her and NeNe could put their egos aside and become friends. I think they would have a great time.

Vicky of OC: If you don’t like Vicky from the OC, that’s understandable. She’s self-involved and her ego is too big for her house. She’s one of the cattiest, and she wants to always be right. People who throw their strong opinions out at will, and then run-away when confronted about them as too fragile and delicate for conflict, drive me crazy. I recently read a blog Vicky did on Bravo.com in which she sided with Jill Zarin 110% and basically implied that Jill was a victim of Bethenny’s mean and hurtful attacks. That’s typical of both ladies. They stir the pot and then, backhand to forehead, sigh and distress about how tumultuous the waters have become.

That said, I like Vicky’s work ethic. I know that she throws her work ethic in our faces CONSTANTLY, that’s only because I think she may be one of the most insecure women we’ve ever seen on TV. She’s constantly angling for a position of superiority. However, I think she means well. I think she really doesn’t know what she’s doing when she wrongs someone, or shows up at her son’s college house with a 6-pack. And that’s the beauty of her: she’s trying, in her own way, to be the best that she can be.

Teresa of NJ: You had me at, “I don’t want to live in somebody else’s house. That’s gross.” I adore this lady. She’s having fun. That’s what life is about!

Frankly, I think most of the NJ cast is extremely likeable, so I will tack Dina, Caroline, and Jacqueline into this Favorites category. Real Housewives of NJ is what I thought I was getting into when I started watching these series. I love seeing how they live, how they dream, and how they play. This is, by far, the easiest cast to watch, even with their own version of villain thrown into the mix (read: Danielle, below).

Bethenny of NY: I think she should narrate every episode of every geographic region. I think that would be hysterical. I’m team Bethenny, by the way, or at least, so far. I see that the tides are turning and Jill is about to start chasing Bethenny around like a heart-sick puppy and I may trade teams at that point. I want these girls to be friends, and I want them to vote Kelly, Sonja, Ramona, and LuAnn OFF the island of Manhattan. Ugh. New York has the most dramatic cast, and I find it the hardest to watch.

Jill of NY: I like her a lot and I love to see what’s going to happen next with her. I enjoy seeing her family dynamic and watching her ridiculous relationship with “Gingah.” I was fascinated when that dog went to the bathroom all over the room when the vet came to the house. But, I have my issues as mentioned under Vicky.

Jill drove me crazy when Bethenny was being the heart-sick puppy. She wanted an apology. Then Bethenny apologized and she said, “Well, did she ask how’s Bobby?” So Bethenny wrote a letter to Bobby asking how he was. Then Jill says, “Did she write me a letter?” It was never enough for her, and I think she really liked being chased. Again, just like Vicky, she stirs the pot, and then when it comes to a boil, feigns distress, like she may faint at any moment. I’m not buying it.

And The Others, who captivate me:

Kim from ATL: I almost want to leave this blank, because I don’t know how to explain how badly I don’t understand this chic. What is she doing? I never know what she’s doing.

Ramona from NY: Ramona is either chemically imbalanced or just absurdly insane. It drives me crazy when Andy and guests talk about her on What What Happens as if she’s a regular person like the rest of us.

LuAnn from NY: Is this woman for real? I mean, seriously. She is the most ludicrous housewife to date.

Jo from old episodes of OC: While wearing pig-tails, sucking on lollipops, seducing a minor, and baby-talking @National TV, Jo pouted for the 2 or 3 seasons she was on about how she couldn’t fit in with the other adults. I think she was under serious delusion that she was a real-life Gabby from Desperate Housewives.

Slade Smiley from OC: Is there a petition I could sign to get Bravo to stop putting this man on the air?

Danielle from NJ: I’ve seen crazy, but never like this before. I’m scared right now, because the NJ housewives keep alluding to something that’s about to happen that makes Danielle’s regular crazy seem mild. I’m scurrred. How many kinds of insane do you have to be before you actually get kicked off a TV show?

And, that’s that. You may disagree, but really,whose gonna check me, Boo? Feel free to discuss, link, and check back for more banter about reality teevee banter. In the happy meantime, check out this post from a recent episode of Real Housewives of NY, but prepare yourself for graphic language and raucous laughter:

Real Housewives of New York: These Are the People In Your Neighborhood by Richard Lawson

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Real Housewives? Yes, Please!

I Love me some Real Housewives, but I find my opportunities for show gossip too far and few between. I’m honestly shocked that people don’t lover those lover-licious housewives same as I do! The rest of the world must have their full share of drama and female hyjinx, but I need my fix. Besides that, I love to see how other people live.

Getting to know real people to see how they live takes forever because most of them want to small talk. I despise small talk because I feel as if it gets us nowhere. Small talk is the verbal equivalent of chasing your own tail. If someone approaches me and, within the first few minutes, we’re talking about real stuff (versus nonsense and fluff), I know that I have met a kindred spirit. For this reason, meeting my husband and I for the first time might seem more like an interrogation than small talk. If you feel inspired, answer these questions in comments and I promise you, I will be no less than thrilled to hear your answers!

#1 “Where do you love to vacation?”

#2 “What do you do with your spare time on the weekends?”

#3 “What do you watch on tv?”

We ask those questions, but if we really like the other people, it’s more like rapid fire and yelling, and not to be nosy. I just imagine that you know a beautiful spring vacation spot, right off the mountains and next to a lake. OR! That you’ve discovered the most serene and private east coast beach spot and no one else has heard of it yet. Perhaps you have a hobby that I have never considered, something that would not even occur to me to try, but I hear it from you and learn that I LoVe it! Or an exercise routine that would knock my socks off and you take a class every Saturday. Who knows? And I’m just spit-balling here. In reality, I never know what I might discover!

But, the big question is: what do you watch on TV? Because I have an entire, hour-long Housewives conversation just waiting to unload onto one unsuspecting viewer. Most people I know have only watched a show or two. Doesn’t stop me. I fill them in on what’s happened since the last show they may have watched and then discuss anything that may have been bothering me or exciting me about recent events. I can’t seem to help myself, I’m so excited about it that it just bubbles out of me.

Furthermore, there is nothing more fun than finding four unwatched Housewives of Anywhere in this Country episodes just awaiting my attention on the DVR. Add one bottle of Pinot and I might as well be on a girls’ vacation. Where you at Housewives lovers?

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