You tweet too well. You tweet twell.

Back story: Do you see what I just tweeted. So, these are super and I wanted to share them first on my blog, and then steal them as my own tweets. You’ve been forewarned, right? I have the right to steal your tweets? OK. We’re agreed.

“That foot sex tweet won me 3 new followers. Cha-ching!” –By Frangia. Intriguing . . .

“Hold on to your asses. BIG NEWS.” –By ALMoreExciting. Exciting!

“How many times can Malcolm Turnbull post the link to his article?” –By eacrook. My kind of funny. How many times had Malcolm Turnbull done it so far?

“I get really distracted trying to talk to someone with no upper front teeth, you?” –By RKLugo. Classic.

“I don’t know Anissa, but A: I am totally pulling for her & sending all my good vibes. B: way to go people! this flood of caring is amazing!” –By causeiamawoman. New age. I love when people openly send good vibes.

“So, if I return the 2 or 3 phone calls I don’t feel like making, will the person who’s not returning my calls call me back? Just wondering.” –By RLVT. Clever. This is just the type of thing I’m talking about. I’m stealing this one for sure.

“who is this strange person sitting in my apartment in a pink snuggie reading Twilight and eating Ramen Noodles? Oh wait. That’s me.” –By Megsstine. Clever. Stealing this one too, but changing the title of the book, changing apartment to house, and changing Ramen Noodles to Cup O’Noodles. Wait. Nevermind. “My” post will be completely new and unrecognizable.

“Today I feel bloated and ugly like a pair of Crocks.” –By SnarkyWeinerDog. Clever. Taking that one; calling it my own.

“In bed with a cute guy. Hope he doesn’t notice.” –By JohannaGohmann. Clever to the point of no fair.

“Rum makes for terrible hangovers. I’m sticking with Vodka.” –By BrownBagCindi. Reasonable.

 “Thanks Roeland Park police for not knocking on our door and windows tonight…#spookypolice” — By LindsayP. Interesting. Why are the police spooky?

“@DonnieWahlberg Soooo, just got my tickets to NKOTB! Woodlands, TX! Can’t freakin wait! I think us girls might get wasty that night fo sho!” –By jdhallm. Funny. I don’t care who you are. Everything about this post from NKOTB to wasty is Love. I like that you “might” get wasty, but it’s also “fo sho.” I would steal this, if it were more believable. “Us” girls, aka my girls, aren’t anywhere near Woodlands, TX.

“When I see a hot tub, I don’t see a hot tub. I see a cauldron for people soup.” –By S_SylvesterGLEE. Too clever past the point of no fair. Let’s pretend we didn’t even see this one because she’s so completely out of my league.

“@chelseahandler chunk convinced me to let him out of the plastic dungeon thing and party hard. Ransom still $1100.” –By JennyfromMTV. Throw-Back. I like this post for several reasons. #1: It’s Jenny McCarthy. #2: She’s speaking directly to Chelsea Handler. #3. Chunk? Goonies? Total Throw-back. A+. I’m not stealing this, I’m afraid I could get sued.

“I’ll also be on CNN tomorrow afternoon (Sat. April 10. I’ll be talking about a number of things, tax debt, spring…” –By SingletaryM. Important. You know what? I’m going to make a post like this, and it’s going to be so important that people won’t even care whether or not it’s true. I love how the post says tax debt, and then spring. I’m going to talk about saving a marriage after an affair, and then swimming pools and beach balls. 

“‘Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.’ -Anais Nin” –By islandcoach. Wisdom. Anais Nin? I hear Jewel singing the name. Lovely choice of quote.

Holy eyes wide open, Batman! I just figured out how to figure out when people are talking directly to me with the @ symbol. I’m having actual back-and-forth with fellow tweeters, so, feeling pretty pro right now. Honest to gosh, next thing you know, I’ll create a sensible and/or witty tweet. 

P.S. Having a spring girls’ getaway next weekend that will knock your socks off when I blog and post pictures. Jenny McCarthy, you are so totally invited. All the best in love and life.


1 Comment

Filed under Around Town, Uncategorized

One response to “You tweet too well. You tweet twell.

  1. Pingback: You Tweet Too Well. You Tweet Twell. 2nd Edition. « On Love and Life

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